…than a man that does porn…
…is being his porn.
It’s when it’s the goodbye little nothings that mean so much turn into something more. Suddenly you know that what he’s thinking and you’re thinking aren’t the same thing. So you throw out some questions… and the answer you get is…
“I have lusted for you.”
Instead of watching some other girl’s body on a screen, he’s watching you in the screen of his mind.
Don’t settle to be lusted for. Don’t settle to be a cheap play thing – or even an expensive one. Don’t settle because there seems like there’s nothing better.
“She dreamed in color. She dreamed in red. She couldn’t find a better man…so she lied and said she loved him…” – “Better Man” by Pearl Jam
That may be the way it feels. But you can. And even if you can’t, it won’t be worth it later down the road. You can’t fulfill lust. No one can. It can never be satisfied. So for now it’s feeding on you, later it’ll be something else. Don’t justify. Don’t rationalize. Don’t be manipulated.
Don’t compromise.
You are your own. Rather, you are God’s. You are His masterpiece, His temple. (ref) Don’t allow human hands to destroy it. Because when you allow your outsides to be compromised, it does a terrible thing to your insides. The line may look fun, past the line may look even more fun. But it won’t be worth it.
The physical body will never be enough by itself.
The psychological being will never be treated the way it should if it grants permission for it’s outward holder to be used. In short, it will not be enough either if it compromises. It’ll just be yet another body. Not yet another soul. Compromise leads only to being seen as a physical object although compromise in essence issues from a choice of the soul.
Wait, one might argue, it was such a small line. But what is a small line, really? There is the line that all the lines leading up to it serve as safeguards. So yes, feeling down your leg might be justified as a small line. But is it really? Because what comes after that? Kissing down the shirt, past the cleavage, digging around in the bra? And what comes after that? And what signal does it send to a girl’s heart when it’s done without complicit permission? Does it make us love the perpetrator? Does the perpetrator love us more or love our bodies more?
If that was your boundary to start with, I’m not here to discuss where lines should be for each individual relationship, well fine maybe. You reached your line. But when you’re line is here and your manipulated (even unintentionally with puppy dog eyes and downcast countenance) to move the line to there don’t be surprised if the “there” line ends up being totally disregarded. If you gave someone your bank account information saying they could pull $100 and they pulled $200 maybe it wouldn’t be such a big deal. But what if they pulled $1000? $1,000,000? Should you just say “That’s ok. Anyone could fall like that”? I doubt many people would say that. Point being, one line leads to another and then to yet another. It’s human nature.
Don’t compromise. You are God’s home. You includes your body.